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Well butter my biscuit that felt like an eternity!

25 . 02 . 24

Well, that’s two hours of my life I’ll never get back.

My mum, my brother, and I went to see Shen Yun Ballet last night at the Lowry Theatre, Manchester. The tickets came at a pretty price (thanks Mum), and I was really rather looking forward to it.

I’m not mad into ballet, but I have been previously blown away by a performance of Swan Lake at the Palace Theatre before now (think it was Swan Lake? Excuse my ignorance, it was something beautiful and breathtaking anyway) and a couple of other off-piste ballet things with my kids, so I’m not averse to it. Also, my dear old Grandma was a ballet dancer and had a ballet school, so contrary to popular opinion with my elephant-footed self, it does run in my veins somewhat!

And come up for air...

So I was really looking forward to it. Mum really fancied it, and it’s always a treat doing something the three of us together. It was always just the three of us until I was 7 when my lovely Step-Dad joined the fam, and there's something still rather nostalgic and cute when the three of us get together. Always giggles and past references. (Earliest memories of which are of ‘treat night’ Saturdays, watching the A-Team with your tea on your knee!).

Now, I like to think of myself as a little bit cultured at least. Love art galleries, going to see live music, theatre, very much into reading a tonne of different stuff, and always keen on the arts as a way to express and heal oneself. So I do have a keen interest in watching humans do something super talented, whatever that may be.

I have absolutely no argument that every single human performing on stage last night was talented through every fibre in their body. WOW. It was absolute precision. There was a whole integrated animated backdrop thing going on too, that made the whole thing really clever. The performers seemed to jump in and out of the animation and become part of it… pretty mad. But nonetheless really rather dull and endless.

Honestly. Sorry to say, but we were all just willing the end to come. The best bit? My mum got the most horrific and inappropriate giggles at this one part when a guy was singing. I’ve never heard anything quite like it. I’d struggle to explain. Warble maybe? That would be crediting the sound too much I think. Safe to say both my mum and the woman sitting next to me had well and truly gone. Crying laughing. Mum was in pain. Said she’d not laughed like that in years (cute and nearly made me cry - she’s renowned for uncontrollable giggles! It’s one of the gorgeous things I’ll always remember. Love you mum).

But fact is, some things just don’t land with us, and that is okay. When I look back to my younger self, there were so many times I’d try to shoehorn myself into spaces I didn’t really enjoy, pretend to like things I didn’t, just to fit in.

And this is the learning here. When we keep plugging away at something we don’t enjoy, when we try to bend to fit expectations, what we think we ‘should’ be doing rather than what we actually want to be doing, or, shock horror, what we enjoy, it saps away joy. Makes us think we are bad at it or failing in some way because we’re not enjoying it, not good at it, don’t fit in with it. Not so! We are all just different.

I literally couldn’t keep my eyes open throughout that performance last night. And I do mean literally - not in the TOWIE overused incorrect usage sense! Trust me, if it was Loyle Carner or Little Simz on that stage - you bet I’d have had enough energy to be up on my feet dancing, because that’s my thing.

And there it is again. That tuning into your energy thing I’m always harping on about.

When we stick with things where we don’t feel comfortable, aren’t our thing, aren’t what we enjoy, and certainly don’t excel at, we have a way of internalising that as us being in some way not good enough, not cultured enough, etc.

But that’s not it at all. We just excel in other areas and enjoy different things. And it’s finding those things and doing them that help you excel in life, feel powerful, feel your best self and help you really create a life you love. That’s the bit I’m brill at. So if you need help with it, you know where I am.

You can always book a free 15 min chat with me here.

Do something you love this week. You deserve it!

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