What decision do you think I made?

Right then, I’ll jump straight in, don’t want to waste the word count with the preamble. I’ve always got so much to say, but I do try to keep it as short as poss (OK, they are never short, but I’ll keep working on it!).

Speaking of working on things, that’s quite the focus of today’s email.

So today, as I type (terribly clumsily, might I add), it’s Friday. Oh, how I wish I learned to touch type years ago. But we are where we are; now I’ll need to unlearn my current default typing settings and relearn a new way that will make me far more efficient. Did you see what I did there? I have just done a double segue into today’s learnings! You’ll see…

I’ll start by saying life happens. It always will. So if you currently operate from the narrative of planning to get ‘XYZ’ done in order to get to ‘insert utopian time in life where everything feels amazing’, and this life thing keeps on happening and buggering up your plans, it really is time you started to smell the coffee and realise it’s time to approach ‘life’ in a different way. Certainly if you want the outcomes to be any different to they are right now.

It's easy to think that pushing through, even when you’re exhausted, will get you closer to that sense of accomplishment and closer to that time when you can 'just switch off knowing it's all done.'

A great analogy is this: You will never tick all the things off your to-do list. It's like trying to get all the washing done; you'll always have to wash the clothes on your back...

Let me tell you what actually happens here when you keep 'pushing through.' You put your body in a prolonged state of "fight or flight." This floods your body with stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline, which might help you react quickly (hello quick temper and hypersensitivity!) but make it hard to stay calm, focused, and strategic. Essentially, your brain switches from using the logical, problem-solving prefrontal cortex to the reactive limbic system, which just wants to get through the stress. This shift leaves your decisions scattered and reactive, so you end up working harder but less effectively. More knackered and to no benefit.

The outcome? Work takes longer, mistakes happen, and the quality drops. So you exert all this effort, but you haven't actually made meaningful progress, you’ve essentially spun your wheels and done yourself in in the process. Sound familiar?

Back to today being Friday, the day that follows Thursday, and the second day I was supposed to have a full day to work; my youngest has been off school for both. Yep, yesterday he woke up not feeling well. Started with a cold which sadly developed into croup overnight Thursday night (he’s nine, so it’s not a big panic anymore, but we do still have to run to A&E on occasion when this hits, so I’d prepped the bag pre-bed just in case. We didn't need to go, so all good, thanks for asking. Well, I know you lovely lot would have asked if you could!).

Point in case: He was off school Thursday, was terrible in the night Thursday night, (so it was a very short-on-sleep night for us both), then he was off again Friday.

Second point in case: Life happens. Life will always happen. You have zero control over it, and coming from a place of thinking you do only leads to frustration, disappointment, and ultimately lack of any progress. Which brings us right back to the point I made at the beginning, that the only thing you have control over is you. Did I just see you roll your eyes??

You hear this all the time, right? Well, I know, I hear you, but I’m coming at this from a different perspective, one that I can absolutely guarantee will upgrade every single aspect of your life. I’m coming at this from the most foundational level, the level through which you can choose to get a handle on your life for good, for ever more.

Physically, constantly pushing through means more adrenaline, cortisol, and higher heart rates; mentally, it looks like overwhelm, constant scanning for what’s “next,” and never really feeling accomplished. And it’s not just feeling frazzled; it's being far less efficient. The more you try to power through, the more your productivity dips, so the hours spent grinding away actually get you less, not more. And your business feels the hit (hello plateau): poorer quality decisions, less creativity, and wasted time redoing tasks or chasing what got missed. So it’s like you're pouring all your energy into keeping the proverbial wheels turning, but your tank is running on empty, and you’re just running yourself into the ground.

So Thursday, I rescheduled my ‘usual schedule’, because I had to!

I always wake at 5:45am and do a yoga nidra meditation for 10–15 mins, shower, blast with a cold shower, write my gratitude journal, and hydrate with water, lemon, and ACV. Then I get the house and kids ready, school run, gym, then get to work.

Obviously with my son off, this needed to be reordered. What did I let go of?

Same on Friday when we had very little sleep. What did I let go of?

Did I just push through and prioritise work? Because ‘I’ve got a landing page to do, I’ve got follow up emails and calls, I have to sign off on a big project I’ve been working on etc…, people are waiting on me.’ Or did I prioritise my nervous system?

100% the latter.

Friday morning, I still set my alarm and did my usual morning routine, keeping my nervous system regulated, so I could get through the day with the energy reserves I had available. My husband stayed at home until 12 noon, so I could do the usual morning routine, the school run with the big one, a client call, and a short gym session. No high intensity, just movement to keep my nervous system as optimal as I could in a sleepless state.

What I actually let go of was a work meeting I had at lunch. Meeting for this lunch was important for me but I have no shame in saying being at home looking after my kids is my ultimate priority, so I was honest and explained this and offered an alternative date. Job done. Still got that to look forward to.

The world is starting to change. More and more people are realising that managing your day by a (never ending) to-do list never truly brings the success, happiness, and fulfilment we all strive for anyway. It’s always shifting, the goalposts always moving, and it comes at a cost, your mental and physical health, the most priceless commodity we have.

But when you manage your life from a nervous system-first approach, you gain control over the only thing you do have full control of, YOU! And from that place, not only do success, health, and happiness come from who you really are, but you also achieve those external goals with better health, greater enjoyment, and far exceeding your initial expectations anyway!

That’s why today, even with my son at home, I adjusted my day, was able to be there for him (making shoebox biomes and of course working while he watched TV under a duvet!), and completed all the work that mattered. Because when you’re operating from a calm, regulated nervous system, you have miles better clarity of thought and focus, which leads to far more productivity with less ‘underlying rage and argh’. Emails written, landing page finalised, all without pushing myself to anxiety or questioning my self-worth (you know I speak from experience!).

The big lesson here? You can continue to live the way of the world in which we have all been raised, trying to control what's outside, all about the hustle and grind, striving for that next box to tick, or you can choose to flip it and approach it differently. Tune into your nervous system, manage your inner world first, and see your success, energy, health, and happiness increase naturally. It’s a way more fulfilling, way healthier path to that next level in your business and life. And I’d love you to join me on this journey.

Choose wisely this week and make it a brilliant one. I massively believe in you.

P.S And for absolute transparency, did I still feel really tired all day? Yes. Did the noise of a family member crunching a tonne of cucumber irritate the sh*t out of me around 4pm? Too right! So I booked a massage and took myself off for that while the kids had their Friday night pre-tea iPad time, committed to Epsom salt soak in the bath later, and got a very early night!