Blog
You need to hear this
28 . 04 . 24
Sometimes we all need a bit of tough love. I’ve just received some, indirectly, having watched a talk by my own business mentor Lisa Johnson, and I’m passing some tough love on to you. I needed to hear it, and I think you do too.
Social media would have us believe that reaching our goals, whatever they may be, comes easily and requires very little effort. It’s why so many of us feel pressure to be ‘successful’ (in the way success is too often depicted anyway) and why we often feel we are failing…
Every day we scroll through, or read about, some incredibly successful human or other, who is killing it in their area of expertise; who seems to have so much time to do all the fun stuff alongside it. By virtue of the fact we’ve chosen to follow them, it’s usually in an area of life we too want to be successful in too.
But what we are seeing here, is their chapter 20.
What do I mean by that?
Well, the people we tend to follow, find inspirational, are usually people who we view as ‘experts’ in something - something we want to be brilliant at or learn how to integrate into our lives too. Generally, they have some level of success that has led them to grow a following whereby they teach their skills to that following, and along with that, grow their own success.
By the time somebody has this level of ‘success’, they have usually been on the journey for quite some time putting in the serious graft, but we don’t see that bit. We just see the bit where they are now, living the life of Riley (who is Riley? I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t just Googled that!). This gives us the false impression that this level of success comes easily. And here we are still in our chapter 1.. (Well 1-5 maybe?), wondering how they’ve made it happen so quickly and easily.
Well I’m really sorry, but that is quite simply not the case. We just didn’t see what went on in their earlier chapters, when they were right in the thick of it.
Do you know how much time, skill and effort it takes to grow an online audience? Believe me, I’m in the thick of it and it’s not nearly as quick and easy as it might look from the outside. It’s far slower than I imagined. Far harder. Far more work and consistent commitment than I ever imagined.
Do you realise how much you have to show up every single day, even when you really don’t feel like it? Even when you are exhausted and feel you have nothing of any interest to say? Yep. Much like the stuff I teach you!
This growth you so want, personal or professional, takes consistent effort. Every. Single. Day.
Equally, do you know how much commitment, effort, dedication and patience it takes to slowly and incrementally apply all the lifestyle changes required to sustain a healthy, happy lifestyle with vitality - enough to sustain you to grow a successful career alongside it too?
This is all part of designing a life around all the things you love and are so passionate about, it creates an all-encompassing, fulfilling life you love. But whoever said it was easy? It isn’t! It becomes so, yes, but you have to put in the groundwork and we are all in the thick of it here!
The key, as I always say, is to start with a solid ‘why’, a reason, a feeling, a lifestyle, a vision for why you are making these changes. Why? Because then, when times get tough, that ever-important enjoyment is still present; because you are inching closer every day to the person you want to be, doing the things you want to do, living the life you want to live.
Yes I invest in myself with some of the best mentors around - they are worth their weight in gold on this journey. I never stop learning and applying and integrating, and passing it all on … much like many of you and certainly all of my clients.
But, the hard truth is, there is literally nobody and nothing in this world; no mentor, no course, no podcast, hypno session, retreat, visualisation, quick fix etc that can change your life, or the way you feel, other than you deciding it is going to happen. Then you have to put in the consistent effort to make it so.
So, here comes the tough love…..
YOU have to take the action. YOU have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable for quite some time, YOU have to commit to being consistent, if you want to make positive, lasting change.
Implementing any lasting positive changes into your life is going to feel pretty hard, professional or personal. You’re very likely going to meet resistance for at least the first year or two. You have a whole lot of old ingrained habits, feelings, thoughts and behavioural patterns going on that are going to take real commitment to rewire and rework!
Getting through the hard bits is what creates growth. Life has lots of hard bits! But avoiding them is where we stagnate. As Lisa said in her tough love call, “Choose your hard wisely”. Decide which changes/challenges you are ready to take on and make a commitment to and do it!
In the beginning certainly, this will likely mean you making the choice of making progress over being comfortable. You’ll definitely have to choose to prioritise your own growth over things like vegging out binge-watching Netflix for a bit!
You're going to have to show up for yourself, for your new life, even on the tough days. But each time you do, you’re building a little bit more trust and belief in yourself, edging ever closer to that vision of you, of your life, being your reality.
You’ll sometimes, often, want to quit, to go back to easy, but you know that wasn’t enough or you wouldn’t be here doing this, so you’ll decide to keep on going. Keep on growing.
Let’s keep going together. Even when it’s hard. Then when we’ve put in the really hard work - let’s all have a massive party and celebrate our commitment. I’m not kidding. It’s coming… It’s brewing!
Have the best week.